Marrying Mozart - Stephanie Cowell

You know how they say you can’t judge a book by its cover? I always thought this meant the image on the front. Well apparently you can’t judge a book by its back cover either – at least not the back cover of Marrying Mozart by Stephanie Cowell.

The publisher’s blurb is accurate enough when it comes to what the story is about; the intertwining lives of the Weber family and a young Mozart at the start of his career. But, the quote from Opera Cues that says the book is, “A frolicking romp…light and fun” is pure bunk. So is the quote from Newsday that calls it, “A splendid, shimmering comedy of manners.” Marrying Mozart is no rollicking comedy. This book is depressing. And has one of the most annoying, nerve wracking, pain in the ass characters I have ever encountered.

Before this book, I had never given much thought to Mozart. He was always just a fierce face in a white wig hovering on the wall in old elementary school classrooms. Now though, having a small understanding of what his life was like and the challenges he faced, I have a small soft spot for the guy. Like the child actors of today, it can’t have been easy for him to grow up always in the shadow of his own youthful image. He spent most of his adult life trying to recapture the fame and success he had as a young musical prodigy. But, when you make your name as a fresh-faced baby-genius, people have a hard time taking you seriously as an adult. Just ask Miley, Lindsay, and any member of any boy band ever.

On top of his professional challenges, Mozart somehow found himself drawn to the Weber family. As they are in the book, I can’t understand why. A music copiest, his horrid wife, and their four daughters somehow managed to sink their hooks into Mozart, and the poor guy could not get free. He first falls for the pretty  second daughter, who then gets herself knocked up before running off with a painter. Then, he thinks it’s a good idea to take a room in the boarding house they run. And then he eventually falls in love with and marries the third sister. It would make a good soap opera, if it wasn’t so damn sad.

It’s damn sad and depressing because Maria Caecilia, the shrew of a matriarch of the Weber family is one of the worst people I’ve ever read about. She spent her whole life scheming and plotting and manipulating to try to marry her daughters off to the highest placed men she could find. She sort of reminded me of Mrs. Bennet from Pride and Prejudice, except that where Mrs. Bennet was trying to get her daughters taken care of, Mrs. Weber is more concerned about what her future sons in law can do for her. More than once she shrieks about how ungrateful her daughters are and how dare they not be worried about her future and who will take care of her when she gets old and don’t they understand it’s their duty to marry rich men so she can reap the rewards.   She’s the most maddening and annoying woman I have come across in a book in a long time.

Mrs. Weber did do one thing, and that’s increase my sympathy for Mozart. How he managed to spend his short life around this woman is beyond me. And that he had her in his ear while creating such beautiful music…well, that takes genius.